Ten quotes that can improve yourself. Hello everyone, I hope you are well. In today’s post, I will be sharing ten inspirational quotes that can improve yourself. It might take a little coffee or probably a few glasses of wine to relax after a hard day’s work. Well, I’m guilty about that one unless I’m caught dead wearing a lampshade over my head after a few rounds of vodka half-naked! Okay, bad example, and I apologize to everyone reading this after getting nightmares about me in that state of drunken stupor.
Just don’t ask how it happened, please.
But what’s interesting is how people go through the regular part of life when faced with vein-popping stress. I mean, the new age thing like Zen or yoga is one of the good stuff, and it works. Is there room for the intellectual side of people who can smell the roses-in-a-can while on the move? I thought there must be something in this ‘mind-over-matter’ thing.
Ten Quotes That Can Improve Yourself
Humour is indeed the best medicine there is whenever you are. I mean, anyone can pay good money to listen to a comedian to make you wet your pants after laughing so hard. Regardless of what’s been happening, and to those who have gone through the ordeal, it’s better to laugh while facing the troubles with a clear mind than anger with a clouded vision. One of my favourite celebrities of all time may have to be Woody Allen. This guy gives you the in-your-face bluntness he pulls out with gusto, even without trying. You can talk just about anything with a man, and he’s bound to mock the subject, and you’ll end up laughing rather than being upset about it.
Woody Allen has this to say:
“Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.”
It sounds good to me, I mean, the practicality of all things does involve money, but it doesn’t have to take an arm and a leg to get it.
“I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it’s the government.”
“There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?”
This happens to be one of the classic ones. I mean, the issue about life’s little problems isn’t all that bad until ‘he’ shows up.
Sure, relationships can get complicated or have complications that probably any author about relationships is bound to discover soon. We follow what our heart desires unless you’re talking about the heart, which pumps blood throughout your body.
“Love is the answer, but while you’re waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty interesting questions.”
And if you want more, keep on asking!
“A fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with me; she said ‘no’.”
It sounds ‘practical’, I think. And when it comes to everyday life, he knows how to make the best out of every possible scenario, and it doesn’t involve a lawsuit if he strikes a nerve.
“My wife was immature. I’d be at home in the bath, and she’d come in and sink my boats.”
I had never had a boat in my bathtub before. Just staring at it while soaking in hot water makes me seasick already.
“I am not afraid of death. I don’t want to be there when it happens.”
If it rains, it pours.
“I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.”
It could get worse when you’re guzzling beer… or mouthwash, and it happened to me once!
“Tell him about your plans if you want to make God laugh.”
At least he doesn’t smite us with lightning, and I’m thankful for that. Despite what may happen to all of us in the next ten, twenty, or even thirty years, we all have to see things differently, not just from perspective. I can’t seem to imagine life without any piece of wisdom that could guide us. Whether religious or not, it takes more courage to accept your fears and learn how to deal with them is all that matters when it comes to getting along.
And to sum things up here is the last nugget of wisdom to go by… however, whenever, and wherever we may be.
“The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have instead of what you don’t have.
I hope you enjoyed that.
Thank you for these laughs. It was needed.
Life is definitely not easy, but it helps to laugh, and these quotes do that! I especially love the one about telling your God about YOUR plans 🙂
These are all such positive and inspiring words. Times are tough and it is nice to read some uplifting quotes!
These are some funny quotes. Thanks for the laugh.
I love all of these quotes!
thanks for the smiles… so true as well
These were all funny. It sure does feel like the government is watching us these days!
Nice lists and I like the one talking about telling all your plans to God and accepting your fears.
I think I love the last quote the best!
All so good! My favorite is the one about telling God your plans
Was very motivational thanks
These quotes are all so great! I love how inspiring they are!